Interactions with God #64

In our apartment in Lowell, my couch would not fit up against the window like it did in Nashua. So, I would instead kneel on the carpet with my head leaning on the seat part of it. This became my new prayer spot.

One morning I knelt there talking to God. Well, I think I was more talking at God. It started off like most prayers really do. “Oh, praise you God, bless your name”…etc. It went on like that for a few minutes, till my mind was not in the prayer at all. I had said the words so many times, they just kept coming out.

Now you might think that God was upset or bothered by this, He wasn’t. No, not at all. In fact, He used my wandering thoughts to teach me something rather profound.

As my mouth was moving, my thoughts had gone back to a girl I dated for a really short time in high school. The girl went on a vacation with her family and she met a guy there. She broke up with me when she came back. From there, I thought of a song from the 50’s about a guy who went away and rumors went around that he was cheating. The song spoke of how the female singer was worried about how her man felt. Her concern, because of the rumors, was that he didn’t love her. In the middle of this wandering meaningless thought, God spoke.

“You know, there is no problem on my end.”

Now I have told this story dozens of time. Unfortunately, most people don’t get the meaning. I knew what He meant. He wasn’t bothered by my wandering, no. He was most definitely referring to the song I was thinking about. He said plainly to me, HE does not have a problem with our relationship. He loves me. There are no rumors or influences that can sway Him. His love is sure.

My love, is the problem. My doubts and fears. Even stupid concerns over thinking that my wandering mind would ever sway the Love of God toward me.

Absolutely not!