Marital Fighting Rules
Updated: Jun 27
You are not perfect, don’t expect your spouse to be.
Seek to win an argument by finding truth, not by being “right”.
You only win a fight, when both of you agree, and grow. Otherwise you lose.
An apology is very powerful, and truly what we want when we are wronged. Be quick to apologize.
God gives forgiveness when He is truly asked for it. You are not better than God. Give forgiveness.
A fake apology is shown when the behavior, that was the reason for it, continues. Act Right, change your behavior.
Name calling is the tactic children use when they have no reasonable argument left. Don’t act like children.
Hurting the other with words or actions is evil. Don’t do these things.
Rolling eyes, humphing, sighing or slamming objects is the same as words and is also hurtful. Act like reasonable people, not like animals.
The better person is the one who will sacrifice first. Choose to lose, and you will always win. Jesus said “The first will be last, and the last will be first.” He was not kidding.
Remember that fights start because one of you feels wronged. The wrong may be perceived, or truly warranted. The battle should be to find a solution to the bad feelings, and offer healing. The fight is not against each other, but for each other. Fight to come to the truth. Did you treat them wrong? Intentionally or not, if so, apologize.
To deny a wrong that you know you did, is a lie. It is cowardly and evil. Do not lie. God will hold you accountable.
If you bumped someone in the street, you immediately apologize, even though you did not do it on purpose. Give your spouse more consideration that you do strangers.
Some days you blow off responsibilities, be gracious when your spouse does the same. You are not their God, you are their partner. It is not your job to make sure they act correctly.
Have the heart to serve. Do what you are responsible for. Especially when your spouse is counting on you. How do you feel when they let you down? When you let your spouse down, you do wrong... you owe an apology.
If you are offended by your spouses action or inaction, either tell them or forgive them. If you punish them by treating them coldly, you do wrong. Would you like to be treated this way?
It is not your job to punish your spouse at all. You are not God. Don’t act like it toward your spouse. You are not that good and never will be.
If you are fighting a lot in your marriage, find out why. The root cause will be both of you. For if just one of you will act like Jesus teaches, then there can be no fight.
Remember, Love is does no harm, it is not resentful, remembers no wrong and does no evil. Walk in the Love of God, not the love of yourself.
PUT GOD FIRST, for without Him, you can do nothing and your marriage will end up as nothing.